i'm capricious

2010-06-18T01:31:00.002+08:00

Love an Illusion?

It's been more than a year now since I've blogged. I thought I would never blog again but

somehow I find myself having to release my emotions this way again. I see myself all alone

in the midst of the night surrounded by the four walls and this computer screen. I find me

all alone again dealings and battling with my emotions.

I ask myself how many times am I gonna climb so high to my peak believing that love is all

it takes to be happy and all it takes to complete me in process neglecting or diverting any

opportunities to success that comes me way cos I've just been so busy with love life.

After all these, I'm drained I realised how much I've neglected myself whilst caring for others,

I've achieved nothing. No wealth, no progress in career or education but stagnant or worst.

This much I've given up all for love.

I'm so so drained.. Should giving up now be the best option? I seem to keep falling in this

bottomless pit. And each time it gets harder and harder for me to climb out of it. It's mental

torture. Yet, I find it so hard to detach myself from you. By right I know I should be doing that

cos this love doesn't seem right anymore. I no longer no it's meaning and no longer have much

faith in it. What have I really learnt out of all this? I've lost so much and what have I gained in

return? Absolutely nothing! I've long been illusioned by this fairy tale of love believing it to be

the best emotion in the world believing that it makes my world go round. Sure it does! But for

how long? Only a good few months of a relationship before everything starts to turn for the worst!

So whats love? Love is a lie! Or at least it has lied to me for as long as I know. True love never

existed! It was all nothing but fabricated on lies! I've been so cheated by this word for so many

years. I no longer can believe it... The heartaches and pain I went through was worth a dime.

I'm fortune's fool as I've allowed myself to be one for so long.

Sigh!

Dear baby,

In these 16 months spent with you and tremendous efforts I've put in? what have I sowed?

In my life of relationships I've never gave this much effort into any relationship as I've done

so for you. It even puzzles me why I do so much for you? Cos this is so not me I've never

been this way. I have never known how it feel like to give this much and feel unappreciated.

But I am finally able to accept the fact that my efforts were quite in vain and expect nothing in

return for it. It's something that had been so hard for me to swallow and accept! Immensely

hurt as I was I knew I have to accept the fact that I can't expect anything return unless you

wanted to yourself to return the favour I guess no one can force you. In fact now, I don't even

feel like I want any more things from you cos that hope died. I just feel very disappointed in how

things have turned out.. I know now that I must stop everything I'm doing and withdraw myself

back into this hole where I've built for myself to retreat. I'll miss the times we had, the days we

spent laughin and playing in the sun, basking in the moonlight and chatting from dawn to dusk.

Our happy moments seem so little but I treasured them all.. We've been together for 1 yr and 4

months now, however out of this 16 months I probably had less than 8 months to know you

or maybe less as the rest have been robbed away by NS. I really wonder what would our outcome

be if you did not have to serve NS? Would we have been any better?

Whatever the case, reality is you are in NS and things between us is beyond salvation and beyond

redemption. As much as it's too difficult to walk out of this, I know that I cannot continue living

in the shadows of myself. Having said these, I guess it's time to close this chapter of my life and

this relationship with you.

Sadness overwhelms me as I will have to drown myself to live again.

I'd also like to thank all my friends and family for being there for me even though I've made so

many wrong decisions you guys have stuck by me. Words cannot express the gratitude I have

towards yall. I love you all and you guys are the best gifts God can ever give to me.

As well as to his friends thank you for the care and concern you all have given to me. I really

appreciate it. Boon is very lucky to have friends like yall.

Good night!

2009-05-25T23:54:00.002+08:00

I'm back from what was the amazing weekend spent with him after 2 weeks of not seeing him...

I really missed U baby! & finally getting to be in ur arms again was the greatest feelings ever...

He didn't have his bike with him during the weekends as it is still under repair.. But that didn't

stop us from having a fantastic weekend..

On friday night he stayed over.. We rented some dvds to watch but we ended up not watchin it

on that night itself cos we came back very late!! Reason being: We had supper at jalan kayu & we

decided to walk all the way back to my hse...LOL we walk for 2 hour plus lo!! but it was fun..

Baby carried me along the way as I was jumping away from insects..we saw all sorts..millipedes,

crickets, moths & even big spidersss...gross..! then we walk past this river near anchorvale & we

sticked our heads over the rail & waved our hands out & the fishes actually jumped out of the

river like in a style of a kallang wave!! Omg we were so excited & playing like as though we were

kids again!! & thats really the joy of being in a relationship with U baby!!! U really complete me

in every single way..It's this little things we do together that makes our relationship special..:)

& we were tired from our adventure walk we stopped by the police post to change my address

as well as to take a break..then continued our walk back..when we got back we were exhausted..

So we didn't really watch the movie but played on facebook awhile then headed to sleep...

Woke up in the morning, took a journey to the west by bus-train-bus to baybee's house...

Chilled out there, In the evening we headed to jurong point where baby treated me to a post-

anniversary dinner..Ate at lai lai the food was good but the service sort of sucked they nearly

over-charged us lucky the guy asked whether I want to check then I said Yes & then I was

shocked how come so many items we didn't order & they charged us for it!! N Baby don't know

he just wanted to pay...HAHA! In the end it was settled..

We went to Gv to buy our tickets for Night at the musuem 2!! It was an awesome movie!!

Loved it!! So funny even baby loved it though he didn't watch no. 1! We wanted to rent it but

it was rented out alrdy.. :(

So before the movie started we played at the arcade for awhile played time crisis again I won to

him! haha.. I was thinking i'm gonna shoot all his sergeants down! & I did it! lol.

Aft the movie we cabbed back & finally watched the movie we rented it a chinese movie called

the Protege.. About drugs and stuff.. a really good & touching movie...Baby got a little bit

emotional over it...

Don't worry ok I'll always stand by you...put it all behind you ok..U have me now & thats all U

ever need! I'll always be here supporting u...I love you Boon! Muax!

After the movie we went straight to K.O. was s tired...it was nice finally getting to fall asleep in

his arms...

We woke up to a buzz of noise outside cos all his relatives came over...Oh man.. So i just decided

to stay in the room & sleep longer lol... While poor darling had to entertain & then watch me

sleep!! haha like finally! cos it's always me watchin U sleep first! U pig! at about 6 we left his

place it was home sweet home for me & goodbye to baby til I see again on friday for yet another

awesome weekend to come!! It's gonna be ur 21st Bday Dinner/Gathering!! I can't wait cos I've

planned so long for this!! I really hope you will love it!! XOXO-

Specially dedicated to my BF! ♥

2009-05-20T05:03:00.003+08:00

I hope my bf will see those logos below...& only know how much he means to me...He is my everything... Losing him will make me feel as if this world had been depopulated... Knowing him has been the best gift from God...I thank God for that...

However, these past few weeks & months has not been easy at all...For both you & I..U could only imagine how alone & empty life is without you...These 2 weeks were the hardest for me,
not only could I not see U for 2 weeks but hardly heard ur voice...& the silence for 4 days not
knowing how u were just worried me & saddened me..I know outfield must have been tough
& every boy goes through it more or less except for the fortunate ones of course...

Through it all we've gone through this toughest phase together nothing deterred us away from
the focal point of just Love.. Love alone didn't just help take us through this.. It was courage,
strength & determination on both our parts that helped us. & in the next phase after ur BMT
will be a continuous test on our relationship the test of endurance..
I am relieved at the fact it's gonna be a little more relaxed after that.. hopefully U will also get to
book out on friday nights...That would be great..

But whatever the shit is I'll stand by U baby! For sake of us & our future happiness that awaits us I'm hanging on...I want one else but U! & I'm sure you alrdy know that...

Hearing your voice today finally after so long just stirred emotions within me..I was confused with what I was feeling for a second..I felt overwhelmed like I wanted to cry..yet felt frustrated..
It was just so hard for me to express it that when I do it usually turns out wrongly...I tend to agitate u further or say spiteful things to U to hurt U...really wonder why I do that..Maybe the one i'm frustrated at is myself! I'm so sorry Baby.. but Whatever it is never doubt my sincerity
& devotion towards U! that has never changed...

Lastly sweetie, do look forward to your Birthday okie? cos i'm looking forward to it so much!!

I hope U will have a great time...& I'm having a great time as long as I can be with u...thats all I want..

Hugs & Kisses to u my love...xoxo-

Your Princess-armygirlfriend. LOL.

2009-05-20T05:01:00.001+08:00

2009-05-20T04:49:00.001+08:00

2009-03-19T01:48:00.006+08:00

7th Mar

We had a farewell bbq for bebe @ Leo's condo...food turned out well & more than sufficient for everyone... Except that I was not well...I didn't eat much i didn't stay on to bbq with him when
I shld've stuck by my bf...I'm so sorry dear I'll never let this happen again...& u won't let me too..
U guys know what I'm talkin about I don't have to spell it out but that night I really made everyone unhappy my friends, his friends & especially him...i let him lose face...Even up til now I still feel so fucking bad...but u know wad? I feel so consoled to know he's so understanding & forgiving & despite it all he still took care of me... Bebe I just wanna let u know I appreciate u & treasure U so much...I'll never take ur kindness for granted agn...I hurt U too many times...I don't ever wanna see u hurt because of me agn..! thank u for loving me!! Muax! I'm really so very fortunate to haf a bf like u! I die also won't let anyone have him! His mine & mine alone...
wahahahaha...

Anyway, after all bebe had fun with his friends & I did have fun with mine too.... :)

8th Mar

Ok that was about the night.. Woke up in the morning feeling like there's a bomb in my head jus waiting to explode...picked up the phone called baby as soon as i got up... & I knew i was gonna get it...& yes I did...i deserved it..but yet he still took a bus down to see me...he's s sweet la...hehe.. we chit chatted a bit at the coffee shop...aft that we walked back to my place whr his friends came to meet us to chit chat under my block..very swt of them...at the end bebe got a free ride home too..haha..

9th Mar
Bebe went to collect his bike from alexandra village...then he came down to see me...chilled at my place then brought me to eat jian dao jian @ jalan besar.... then brought me to spend some quiet moments at kent ridge park...not very nice place tho lots of insects & view not as nice as mount faber...but still his company was awesome enough...:)

10th Mar
It's was my dearest mummy's 44th Bday! Yaayy..cheers to mum another year older but always young still...love u mum...hope u had a great bday...Sis bought the cake...Bebe & I were at his place & arrived later....we jus bought drinks & tons of sushi!! haha..loved the salmon one! yumm...following us was our da ge's arrival...he came with tessa...well he brought himself only as usual empty handed..hahaha...! so were we all...I owe my mom big big pressie ok?
Had fun photos will upload later...;)

11th Mar
Bebe stayed over the previous night & sent me to see the skin doctor @ national skin center early in the morning appt was at like 820 am...we barely slept...! After that we headed to clementi to da Bao food & print out some photos of us.. den headed to his place to sleep!
woke up quite late at bout 6pm haha...then we had dinner & bebe sent me home early! :)

12th Mar
Last day I spent with him before bebe enlisted into camp!! Baby woke up early came & pick me up then went to Astons @ Cathay for lunch!!! He really ate alot lor!! haha I ate 1/4 he ate 3/4 tis time more than his usual 1 n a 1/2 portion wen his out with me... hahaha...poor dear...but he enjoyed it i haf pictures to prove it!!! haha.. that day the weather was particularly hot & we really didn't haf the mood on walking anywhr or buyin anythin...So we went back to his place...
I helped him to pack his army stuff & all...felt so sad...i knew then im gonna miss him like hell...& wish the 2 weeks will fly by fast..! after that his friends called all of them wanna meet him for the
last time to shave his head lol! so first we met for dinner @ macs amk gardens thr...aft everyone
arrived we went to wei cheng's place at novena thr...whr they had fun shaving & laughin their guts out at bebe's hair...poor boy was a clown tat night...I took lots of pics... & even a video...that all will be uploaded soon... at about 11+ the fun was over it was back to the painful reality of him
leaving me for 2 weeks...he sent me back & that night i surprisingly didn't cry maybe cos i've been cryin too many nights alrdy...haha but bebe wanted to cry... that night he went back spoke on the phone with me all the way til 4 in the morning..

Friday the 13th!
& also my 1st day being without him...it was bad for me i tell u...my whole mind is him him him...i cld barely focus on anyone or anythin else...thank god I had work that day & my lovely besties came to look for me @ my workplace! I appreciate it lots guys...Thank U for being there for me!
Thanks for the moral support! Love U guys... :) That day I did drink but in moderation tis time! haha i stayed back aft work til about 5+ chattin with em... the 2 YZ's were chattin alot on army so i got so excited i jus wanted t listen tho i know nothing much abt wad they're talkin..lol...anythin that had to do with my bebe's welfare i jus wanted to hear...haha..

14th Mar - 18th Mar
I've been coping fine...Knowing that bebe is ok! He passed his ippt at 1 taking...his whole platoon 38 fail 6 pass & his 1 of the 6...So proud of him...He did it... So dun haf to waste time to retake...Love u bebe...Ur calls have kept me alive....just listening to your voice entices me...
U are all I need really...I've never believed I'll fall in love this much again after my failed r/s years ago...I believe I've finally found the one...I'm so happy so very happy...Never knew I would be this happy with u...Never regretted just anticipating for more...I know the next few days & months down the road will be full of obstacles for us but I haf so much faith in us...we'll
go thru this together no matter what it takes... I promise u I'll stick faithful by you & love u unendingly... I treasure the moments we spent together... each time i miss u I'll look back at how we spent our fruitful time together before u enlisted & tats enough to just keep me goin each day... & now it's down to 9 days... I can't wait...keep looking forward baby! jia you! when u come
out we're going to eat huo guo right?!! I can't wait I know u can't too...& remember our promise U still owe me a present!! haha! I want my 3/4 pants! Muax! Love u...

For once people I'm abandoning my rule of no blogging personal stuff here!!!**

I can't help it I love my BF too much!!! i need to say out to shuang abit..!

2009-03-06T13:10:00.003+08:00

Ok hi everyone...........
Firstly I'd like to say I feel like the world's most happiest girl everyday in the past 2 weeks...
I'm happily attached to Mr Lim Peng Boon.....
I think he makes me float on cloud 9 every single day.....
I can't remember when a r/s has made me feel tis good about myself....
& ya enough said...here's an update on this past 2 weeks...

16 Feb:
The day we got tgt & the day he bought me a dress too...;)

17th Feb:
Spent the day with him...he brought me to NYDC for dinner then to labrador park to chill out..
I think it was my first time there...Nonetheless had loads of fun...;)

18th Feb:
Spent the morning @ his place... then met up with wei cheng & stephy for bak kut teh at balestier...Then we went back to wei cheng's for sushi somemore... super full that day!!
After that baby took me to punggol end where we had a heart to heart talk...

19th Feb:
Met Baby up at woodlands.. took the bus for once as im always on his bike im suddenly not used to the bus...but i haf to get use to it...
So babe went to collect his road tax from his friend in woodlands area too after which we went
back to his place to chill & aft that had curry peng at jalan besar..! awesome food love their
jian dao jian curry!
Aft that it was home sweet home for me...;)

20th Feb:
He picked me up from home... we went to golden mile to get his army stuff & ate there too...Baby
like their prawn noodles thr... it was yummy but too bad im allergic to prawns i couldn't eat them..;( after that he brought me to little india to do threading & baby rode his bike against the
traffic his always doing that....hahaha...so pai kia!! Aft threading it was taka for dinner we ate at
coffee club & I must say their Baked Spagetti Bolognaise was Awesome!! REALLY! loved it!!
& I recommended baby to try the Garlic Prawn Pasta & he loved it so much too...then again I
didn't cos it was Prawns!! I think Baby had his Prawn Day OUT!! muahaha... love him...

21st Feb:
We met up with Mer & Leo at this new club it clarke quay's Central...it's called Helipad was a really cool place they played trance & house...on a sat night & their cover was only 12 bucks very
cheap indeed & somemore it includes 1 standard drink....& really lives up to it's name a Helipad!
the view was beautiful....I had some photos for this day shld be up soon! :)

[insert pics]

22nd Feb - 28th Feb
Did nothing much...But as usual I'm always with baby spending as much time with him as possible before he goes into NS...Im gonna miss him like hell... Also I went for interview at
Leo's workplace backyard bistro got a job there...working part time with them...for the time
being...have work better than no work at all...right... so baby's really happy for me too...
On a friday night Baby called all his frens out for a gathering before he enters into NS....all
met up at simpang bedok for dinner...I had a little quarrel with him before that but he apologised
later on so everythin was fine...aft simpang we went to east coast park whr they started a camp fire with toilet paper....sticks & wadever they cld find...I was still quite sick & recovering from my bad flu & cough so i stayed away from the fire....after that the guys went to climb trees
as usual our dear Lao Gao(baby) lives up to his name climbs the tree! & falls off it sustaining back scratches to his forearm....for not listening to his dear's advice that was he gets!!!hahaha..
anyway he stayed over that night & spent sat morning helping my bro & mom do drilling...
hahaha poor baby...kenna torture....but hey they love u ok...!
Then after that we went to watch he's just not that into you... great movie.... really touched me...
It made me remember someone not worth thinkin about now.... & got all emo again baby took my shit he accompanied me to drink & i thought I was going to get all emo & irritate him but
surprisingly I didn't & we had a great time chatting...Im really so lucky to have him in my life...
Thank U for putting up with me sweetheart..!
Never once ever regretted being with u.....& I doubt I ever will!

2nd March:
I went to work at 6 pm i't was my first day at work! & guess wad?! it was fucking boring I practically worked til 1am with nth to do at all....! not much customers at all..I think i was earning stupid money but it still feels good la....& guess wads better staff drinks as in a pint
of san miguel is at $4.90 for us if we wanna drink aft work....! haha... cool right? so happy...
ok anyway baby sent me to work & picked me up after work....I have such a great awesome
BF seriously damn lucky!!! love him to bits n pieces...muaxxx!!

3rd March:
Baby sent me to work in the morning worked from 12 to 6pm... was raining so bad he was drenched in the rain while riding to my place...Poor baby...sorry dear...U do so much for me I appreciate u so much.... so he accompanied me at work for about an hour playing pool with me
at my workplace as there was absolutely nobody...then he left after that to his aunt's specs shop
to make a new pair of specs for camp...then came back for me at 6 plus... we had dinner in town
at muddy murphy's orchard towers...their fries was like 7 bucks!!! for a small portion!! Rip off!!
but dear loved it!! after he brought me to kent ridge park it was quite nice thr...except not as
nice as labrador but still who cares it was the company that matters right... this few days spent
alone with him was great...! after that he sent me back...:)

4th March:
Woke up early was supposed to go see my skin doctor but in the end i didn't... I changed my appt
to the 11th... So then I accompanied him to go do his bike at bukit merah.. cos his bike is already
due for major servicing... so many bad news his bike needs an overhaul which is gonna cost baby
a bomb! poor thing!! yet he can't sell it off cos he makes a bigger loss...& i don't want him to downgrade...:( & he doesn't want too... so our poor baby(cbr 400) is gonna be left in the bike shop for 4 days & for the 4 days we'll be on public transport...
I already miss baby(bike) so much...! get well soon ok then we'll have fun looting out tgt...!
hahaha ok i've put in too much affections into the bike...til dear said aiyo jus a bike only no need to be so sad until want to cry.... then after that his words backfired at him...he himself miss his
bike alot alrdy...hahaha...
after that we took a bus to jurong east interchange...we went to IMM awhile to get baby's boxers had mos burger thr...then went back to his place to catch some sleep...at about 8 plus baby sent
me home by train & bus...was a long way home...feel bad he hafta take the train & bus all the way back himself so "xin ku" him... But then again I spent a fabulous day out with him... Slept early as I recharged my energy for the next day out to Sentosa with bebe!

5th March:
Woke up early bout 9 in the morning.. bebe called me first... got rdy... I took a train down to harbourfront to meet him...weather was looking fine... so we took the sentosa express down to
beach stn... we had breakfast or rather brunch at the hotdog parlour at underwater world thr...
There like lots of peacocks roaming freely around with their little chicks...I swear the peacocks were fucking irritating...! They wanted steal our food!! Bebe kept shooing them away hahahaha...
we hurry ate then we went over to Cafe Del Mar to tann...We didn't use tanning oil or anything hence suffering from sunburnts now...haha...ouch! anyway the sun was great jus occasionally hiding among the clouds... so we got the deck beds... we had a mojito... & tons of carlsberg! trully
refreshing i tell U...The weather's so hot U don't even get high by the beer...! we smoked chatted
tanned & even swam in the pool with no one to disturb us at all...wasn't crowded or anything... sat by the pool bar & continued having beer!! gosh!! im black now!! hahaa...
We tanned after that til bout 445 then we washed up & left....
*OH YA*
We decided to play the Luge u know the go-karting thing... We got student price... like 6 bucks a ticket...hahahha... we took the sky ride up over to the other side...exilarating view... we were overlooking the rasa shangrila resort! that view was panoramic... Not till my slipper dropped when we reach...from panoramic to paranoia....hahahaha! i was so paranoid i literally scream la!
the guy was like don't worry don't worry get off first....got back my slipper & headed to the Luge!
ahhhh....I challenged him he tried to overtake me so i cornered him til we both swerved all the way into the bushes... hahahahha... we got up i exchanged cars with him cos mine was full of mud
on it...hahaha... i dragged his car all the way beside mine & continued our journey! & guess wad?!!
I WON PPL!!! I won!! hahahahha
Do I get a free lunch?
hahaha nvm he give me alot of things free liao...
nv ji jiao!
hahhaha one more funny thing we laughed so hard all the way til we forgot to remove the helmets on the way out... the lady was like y u guys dun want to take out ur helmets ah?!! & she was sooo laughin at us...
funny sia...
That was about our beautiful day out...
After which it was out of sentosa...
A long bus journey back to bebe's place...Had dinner there....his mom cooked really good food...
I think I had like 2 bowls of rice...!!
Haha...
Bout 9 plus bebe sent me home again by bus & train cos he's bike still not ready...seriously miss
baby(bike) alot already! I can't wait to sit on her agn...!
He was actually jus supposed to sent me to woodlands then put me on the bus then he go back..i was thinkin funny y he say bye bye to me then he nv go off instead he following the last comers behind onto the bus! hahaha he pop in front of my face suddenly i really got a shock! i was like wtf?! then he was like i take the wrong bus la!! He ahhh... forever doing crazy tings!
Was home at about 11 plus but it was raining so heavily when I reached...! poor dear had to run back to the bus stop in the rain...However I feel God has been really great to us tdy... it has been
raining almost everyday the past few days...but just as we decided to go to sentosa to tann I prayed for good weather & it was really great weather! Thank U God for letting me enjoy wadever that's left of this 1 week with him!! I LOVE HIM!! muaxx..!

End of story..
-Stay tuned-
Loves...;)

Photos...

2009-02-12T19:03:00.002+08:00

7th Feb

Firstly, I'd like to wish Baby Happy 20th Bday!! I'm sorry I cldn't be there to spend this day

with you but I did give U an advance one by going up thr...Right?

Ur finally 20 la...haiyo no more 19 ah remember!! 20s already...feel old already right...

Hahaha..

Tdy, was one the busiest days.. woke up at 8 am in the morning & started shifting hse already..

Movers came at bout 10am.. while i shuttled to & forth my new & old hse with my mom just

moving our electrical stuff with my mom such as tv & computer... cos my mom didn't trust

the movers with handling it.. so damn tiring really... i think i went back n forth carrying heavy

stuff til my back hurts... at least like 5 times... the day before we painted the whole hse & all...

at my new place we were busying with unpacking & cleaning up the whole place after that

after that my grandma complained & chest pain & my mom rushed back to my old place to

send her to the hospital... where she's warded in SGH... so went down after cleaning up to see

her...after so dead tired came back & knocked out..

8th Feb - 12th Feb

Woke up early the next few mornings... with contractors coming in for all the different purposes

drillings & stuff... noise noise noise!! I continued to unpacked...touch up my painting... clean up

& up til now I still haf so much to unpack I've decided to slowly do that...with my grandma being

in hospital...my mom also haf absolutely no time to do any unpacking plus she has work so she's

prob stressed out to the max...hence I haf to help her with most of it....

Yet I still found the time to meet up with my girls on the 10th at G4... had nice hang out...

Steph joked alot abt her cousin HAHAHAHHA... hilarious... we had tau hui... Boon came along

to chill out with me & my friends...had fun...

was sort of like relaxing after so many hectic days...

WAD weighs most on my mind now is my Grandma & I need a Job really!!!

God please help me!

I got nothing much left to say now... going to visit my grandma agn soon!

I'm off....

2009-02-12T17:53:00.004+08:00

KL trip...
2-4 feb!

I know you guys been anticipating this entry most...

Haha here goes..

Went to KL by bus... met J there at puduraya when i reach it was raining

CATS N DOGS!! damn it!! i was caught in the bloody heavy rain with the ground

all flooded with water...somemore i was wearing shoes!! that feeling sucks!!

wad could be worst rubbish all over the floor...it's was a disgusting sight! eeeyucks!

but I tolerated whilst whining about it of cos! Haha J tolerated me...

We took a train back that night straight to nilai back to his place it was a long 1 hour journey

back by train....rain dampened our moods...by the time i reach nilai it was bout 9 plus... we had

our dinner & went back to his place...was real dead tired that night..=)

Woke up bout 11 plus 2nd day where we got rdy then he drove up to damansara somewhere

in KL i tink to meet his friends... not bad quite cool people they like work in a tattoo shop...

their tattoo designs are not bad I think of goin back there maybe to do a tattoo when i'm ready..

guess it's alot cheaper too.. I really do think of doing a dragon of not for it being associated as

"ah Lian" I will so do it!

anyway, we had lunch at this restaurant called Friendster! hahaa it's like a boardgame cafe ting

they had really good fish & chips... also so relaxed actually had a heart to heart conversation with

J for once til his friend appeared behind him.. hahaha.. then everything stopped... so sad.. :(

later on his friend took us to the shopping centre "the CURVE" to walk abt and eat..

I finally had what I was craving for my fav A&W!! haha...

We kinda ordered too much bought this waffles in a cup thing which we didn't even eat!!

hahaha i wanted it & wasted it! sad!! stupid me...

after that we walked about abit.. nth much to shop there.. but nice place overall..

very modern too...

after which we headed back to his fren's place bought beer & drank... beer there is equally

as pricy as sg somemore we bought from the coffee shop nearby..

damn...

Chilled out with them abit...listening to house music while the rest went to jam in the room..

haha..bout 11 plus i was really tired & didn't want baby to drive back too late cos it was about an

hours drive back to his place had to head on the highway agn.. so i pestered him to go back..

haha but before that we ate at the mamak shop... U know i'm actually surprised that some

of the coffee shops dun even have drinks like coke or chrysanthemum tea!! gosh!

I was lost at wad drinks to order... stuff like teh o ice limau they have all their homemade

drinks... oh ya forgot mention on the first night when i had dinner i had their char kway teow

it was awesome taste so different form sg's one it's even nicer!!! but their drink i ask for

chrsanthemum tea they gave me this weird drink...it's supposed to be homemade but it

tasted like piss in state i think!! not that i've tasted it!! but it was fucking gross..! swear!!

haha!

after the mamak shop anyway we made our move first & headed back...

had a shower & smth frightening happen! i swear his place is haunted...it's also ulu cos it's

facing a forest... & u know malaysia's forested region HUGE!! fucking scary halfway bathing

I heard heavy breathing & sounds that don't sound anything right!! cos the sound was like

coming from just beside me!! I immediately throw water wash off the bloody soap & jumped out

of the toilet...the whole night after that I couldn't sleep I was tossing & turning!! arghh!!

& I still continued to hear things...cld go mad!! I told him & he knows about it too he's equally

as afraid of all this... but he jus tries not to think of it! that night I just hugged him to sleep!

Thank god he was beside me otherwise I don't think i'll even sleep...

What an experience...

3rd Day I already packed up prepared to leave.. he packed up cos he was going back to malacca

too..we had lunch nearby with his best friend elijah & his gf.. After that Elijah dropped us off

at the train stn where we took the train back to KL & got a fucked UP bus back to SG!!

I swear the bus was FUCKED up! But leaving him was more fucked up of cos...

I hate saying goodbye like that 3 times already la... sigh...

Anyway the bus journey took me nearly 6 plus hours!! real crazy! it could have been shorter

if the bloody driver took the 2nd link!!! but he didn't!!! I don't understand Y!! & better still

before we bought the bus ticket I asked the stupid lady at the counter whether I had to change

bus & she said NO!! but it turned out the stupid bus stopped at somewhere in JB & asked us

to switch to another one! Stupid lying bitch I was so pissed off by then!!

The bus stopped at ayer keroh to rest first then headed for JB where he dropped off some ppl

like anyhow also can... dunno this bus company it's not even konsortium turned out to be 707.

anyway we changed to a much lousier more fucked up bus! took us to woodlands checkpoint

& we had to wait another half an hour for the bloody bus to come back for us cos the customs

didn't give clearance they search thoroughly through the bus for half an hour! & the driver had

problems with his passport really sway!! I'll never take that bus agn!!

Once cleared he alighted us at Queen St when it's supposed to be at golden mile!!!

Fuck man... was so fuming mad...that was my whole trip the screwed up journey back..!

Geez... But i really had a nice time with there with J.. I miss him already..

[I can't decide what I can't predict]

I wish us the best..baby I don't know how meant to be are we... but I do believe God knows

what best for me.. ;)

Take care ppl..

Btw sorry guys there were no photos this trip cos I cldn't take my camera along! =(
Loves//*

Updates!!...

2009-02-12T17:38:00.002+08:00

CNY!

Back after so long of not blogging..seriously busy busy busy..!

Haha & not to mention LAZY!!.

Surprisingly this CNY I didn't take any photos I didn't dress up either..

& I think I collected altogether 120 bucks worth of ang baos..

It's actually a record considering the fact that I've only got bout 60 plus last year..

Hahaha..

This year is a bad recession year yet my relatives has been so generous..! Surprise!!!

The least in an ang bao i got was like 6 bucks! last year even 2 bucks also got!

those who give 2 dollar ang baos might as well don't give seriously!!

Haha like steph said their 2 dollar not even enough to buy 1 packet of chicken rice...buy alrdy

still must top up 50 cents! lols!

Overall, I had a happy CNY... first day was at home with realtives....mom's side..

2nd day went to visit my dad's side gambled & all damn shiok won quite a bit la!!!

HAHA!!

then collected somemore ang bao from dad's side..!!

that was about my CNY really...

=)

2009-01-18T23:06:00.002+08:00

I'm in a bad shape(hung over) & in a bad mood totally no mood at all..

& to top it off I just bought a calling card intending to call J..
but the FUCKING calling card just wouldn't work!!
I'm so upset now.

Miss U so much B...
I guess I'm just gonna hafta sleep it off or hope you'll call me..

Tomorrow are my exams good luck to me!
Really hope I pass..
K too tired to type on any further..

Nights..

Love yall..

2009-01-16T02:04:00.002+08:00

Astrology Compatability!

I actually found this on my sis blog.

& I found it quite interesting..hence, I decided to try it out myself ;p

here's what it says...

Capricorn & Aquarius
When Capricorn and Aquarius join together in a love match, they tend to bring out the most positive attributes of one another. Capricorn is a more cautious, rational outlook on life, while Aquarius is insatiable, fostering an idealistic approach to nearly everything. On the surface, they may seem like total opposites, but once these two set eyes on one another, an unbreakable bond is formed.
Both Capricorn and Aquarius can be opinionated to the point of seeming unwilling to compromise. Capricorn thrives on organization and is always looking for consequences. Aquarius is modern and finds routine troublesome and boring. Capricorn will find wonder in Aquarius, but may get frustrated trying to find a stitch of logic in their partner's desultory, mystical mind. Aquarius will not appreciate the domineering streak in their partner, but will find the solid base that Capricorn provides to be a great support and will be relieved that someone will help them to take care of their personal matters.
Capricorn and Aquarius are ruled by Saturn, and Aquarius is also ruled by Uranus. Saturn is a cool, traditional energy. This planet is very goal-oriented and devoted to progressive thinking. Capricorn and Aquarius merge their strengths to Aquarian revolutions or Capricornian social status. Uranus is about all things different and unusual. Capricorn will show Aquarius a life based on organization, rationality and comfort. Aquarius can help Capricorn to dream more and possibly stand up for their beliefs.
Capricorn is an Earth Sign and Aquarius is an Air Sign. Aquarius sees life as an random exploration, while Capricorn looks for a specific result. At times, these two may understand where the other is coming from. Conflicts can arise in this relationship if Capricorn becomes overly regimented or Aquarius drifts off too often into flights of fancy. Both partners need to learn that they have a unique way of navigating life's paths, and so have many things to share with and learn from one another.
Capricorn is a Cardinal Sign and Aquarius is a Fixed Sign. Both can be implacable, opinionated and stubborn. Both partners have an intense drive to obtain objects of their desire. If they have a plan, they'll stick to it until they have what they want. Capricorn prefers to generate the ideas and to dole out the assignments. Aquarius is pleased to help Capricorn out if they are given a substantial role. Conflicts may occur due to the pigheadedness of both Signs. However, if they understand they're working together for a common goal, it's much easier for them to achieve noticeable results.
What's the best aspect of the Capricorn-Aquarius relationship? It's the unbreakable bond they form when they come together. This relationship will be enlightening and a delight to both partners. Their love will be a valid asset, not only to themselves, but to those around them.

hmz then there's also the chinese compatability..

here's what it says...

Sign Compatibility Test compares your Chinese Year, Month, Day and Hour Signs.

Dragon Snake 75%
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Person 1 Person 2 Rating

Wood 3 3 2

Fire 0 4 2

Earth 3 3 -1

Metal 3 0 -1

Water 1 0 -3

_____________________________________________________________

Decent Shot - Small bumps in the road will be just that. Everyone will have to let off the gas every now and then. But you and your man will get over the bumps and step on it again.
Final Rating: 63%

Hmm 63% only... sobs:(

Haha..but compared to the first astrology reading above, I still feel the 1st one is more

accurate..:)

Thats all folks!

2009-01-10T16:49:00.003+08:00

9 MORE DAYS TO EXAMS!!

This is getting so scary!!

I gotta MUG hard for the next 9 days & after that I can finally

see my Baby! haha. for now it's stressstressSTRESS...!

JIA YOU!

2009-01-09T00:40:00.002+08:00

Good Evening everyone!

I'm 1 hell of a lazy blogger. I take ages to put up entries & i tend to procrastinate alot.

BadbadBAD..sorry guys..

But here's a brief summary..

From Xmas running up to New Year I've been super busy..

Xmas was alright..

Had lunch at my own place & relatives from my mom's side came over...

In the evening I went to my dad's side to visit...this year was pretty quiet but nonetheless fun!

HAHA!!~

Pics for xmas are in my facebook quite lazy to put it here so pardon me..Im sure most of yall

would have seen it right? :)

As for New Year, It was actually my long awaited day the 31st of dec 08 finally came where

I headed up to malacca to see the person i've been longing to see! haha.

My mom was initially very worried abt driving up there.. but it turned out we had lots of fun

& laughter all the way up.. She did so many silly acts it was hilarious.. my mom's a joker..

or for that moment she had a bimbotic moment to share.. LOLs...

It goes like this...we were at the toll my mom & I didn't know we were in the wrong lane

we went to the 'touch & go' lane so wad she did was she still went ahead & tried she used

her hand to tap on the machine.. then obviously the barrier didn't open.. so she paged for

someone & wad she told the person made me wanna jump out of the car & run away haha..

she told the person "I tap the machine why never open ah? I already tapped so many times.."

& the guy was like "No no you haf to reverse and go to the extreme left lane & pay.."

God so she reversed a long way back...lucky there were no cars behind...

Then me & my sis just continued to laugh at her after that...

Luckily we went there all prepared too.. we bought big bottle of water, chocolates & sweets to

last our 3-4 hr long journey!! we didn't even stop by cos we felt it wld be dangerous as we're

just 3 females in the car only... so my poor mom had to tahan...

by the time we reached malacca they were already high tide..

JJ didn't arrive at the toll in time so my mum & sis parked & went to use the toilet first while

I contacted him..

So we drove a little further in so we cld meet him in between lucky i had the paper with pictures

& directions on it la... Otherwise Jay wld be a dead duck I swear..! haha thanks for making us

wait B. Ur forgiven...lols..

It was still early abt 10 in the morning so we hanged arnd at a shopping mall first got some

stuff for his family & the other families then ate lunch at nandos a portuguese restaurant there

food was not bad but I was suffering from a lost of appetite... Guess it was cos I was really tired

didn't sleep the whole night... but that was jus the beginning I didn't expect I wldn't be sleeping

for 3 nights in a row!!! I was a walking zombie man!

In the afternoon J took us to my granny's place visit them & then we went to visit he's

grandma's place cos everyone is gonna be there.. It was went I reached there that I met his

brothers & his mom...I was nervous as hell..lols but it really wasn't that bad...they're all rather

warm ppl... such a big family over there I cldn't finish remembering their names & faces..

hahahah.. & jus in front of his grandma's house was the beach! it was beautiful really..

But the afternoon sun there is a Killer I swear the sun is scourging.. that it really burnt off

1 side of my ear..really painful..not kiddin... when i was in the car I had to use a paper to cover

the window cos the sun really burnt me..it's not like the sun here it hot but bearable... there

it really burns u... Tat pretty much explains why they're pretty dark complexioned there..

thanks to the sun of malacca! haha..

Aft that afternoon of lazing out we went back to the hotel where I thought I could change

to a nicer outfit in preparation for the nights countdown as well as my bday..

But something just happened that night that sort of spoilt my mood to celebrate & my entire

night...I shall not go into details about wad happened...

But somehow my fears became reality I knew i was gonna haf a bad bday again.. for the

4th year in a row I cried on my bday...

I just hate liars... I really hate ppl lying to me...

Sigh..

Ultimately the person who disappointed me also surprised me with a beautiful bday cake..

with 2 big fat candles to symbolise the fact im already 20!! 2 with a big fat 0! Suddenly I

feel so old..Lols.. time is flying by all too fast...can i turn back the hands of time??

woohooo wld be glad to do that..

unfortunately..NOT!

But anyhows thank u bebe for the beautiful surprise I pray wadever I wished on my bday will

come true..I pray 2009 will be a great year for me & everyone..

So much other things happened in malacca....

But i shall not talk about the unpleasant ones...

Hmmz i forgot to add the kids there were awesome they haf such a colourful vibrant childhood

I so admire them they're brave & daring to try anythin new...love them so much...

close to new year they were all playing with fire crackers & even FIRE WORKS...

it was beautiful even more beautiful than marina bay cos it was the feeling of family i can't

explain it...but those fireworks came out from almost every household there... amazing display.

Really!

I just sat chit chat with relatives here & there drinking my beer then my mum & sis were tired

& wanted to head back to the hotel & sleep that's whr bebe drove them back & i accompanied

him along cos obviously I'm gonna go back so early..night was still young.. haha after we fetched

them back thats whr our fun started..bebe brought me to his dad's side of relatives to say hi...

so many of them...my goshh....so nice ppl...we had a beer there..he's relatives were like telling us

drink drink mus drink one...hahahha..so i jus took a can of beer. Aft that we hopped back onto

the car where B brought me to his dad's place whr I saw somemore of his other relatives...

HAHAHA...gosh such a big family..his dad's place was so nice...all the christmas decorations on

all the houses in the portuguese settlement was truly spectacular...they really decorate their

houses with so much elaboration it's much better than walking down orchard rd looking at the

lights...it really was much better!! I'm in love with the place...!!! Aaaahhhh...

hahaha my mum too...she kept saying aft that she wants to buy a hse there... HAHA...

I hope so! houses there are not that ex at all...affordable & nice...

Ok continue with my story, after his dad's place we headed back to the seaside home of

his grandma's hse where I chilled with my uncle & played with the little ones... & cam-whored

I was quite drunk by then too & my uncle kept irritating me so i when chasing after him like a

little kid & humiliated myself!! hahaha.. U know what I can't believe I did that too..But it was

great exercise! lols..punctured after that...

Slowly one by one of them left & Bebe's friends were waiting for him at the playground jus along

the sea there.. so we walked over whrhe chilled out with them talking for awhile then I sort of

fell aslp on his shoulder..hahaha so drunk alrdy.. about 5 plus he sent me back to the hotel...

Slept for a few hours & woke up 2 nights without much slp alrdy I was truly stoned...!

but mom didn't care she said I had to get up so I did... I went for breakfast eating like a zombie

I totally had no appetite to eat.. I felt like sleepin as i ate.. hahaha.. i really endured...

Mom wanted to take a river cruise which I thought was quite anal la...but anyway i just did it

for her sake la since she agreed that i can go back to hotel & catch a nap after the ride while they

went shopping...so i was really grateful she didn't blow her top at me...

boat ride was exactly like the hippo cruise la!!! omg... so fucking boring that me, my mum, sis

cam whored til we got sick & started stoning at no where wondering when will we ever reach

back..Hahaha.. it was close to 45 mins can? gosh...!

at least i got to see the old old kampong houses..the eye of malaysia..ok la...

never sit on the eye of malaysia tho...too little time spent most of our time in settlement & it

was a bliss! :)

Aft that I went back to the hotel & slept... called bebe then he came to look for me at about 1

plus...so i woke up got ready & we went to meet my mum at the shopping centre...still felt tired

haha..but he jus keeps me awake..i dunno y.. haha guess it's just that feeling of after so long

I finally get to see him I don't even wanna close my eyes for second kind of ting...

Hahaha then after that something funny happen we cldn't find parking lots! so we came

back to the hotel to park agn ... Skali! hotel also no more parking lots.. but there was this really

& i mean REALLY steep slope near st paul's church where thr was a lil space so bebe tried

to squeeze in that lot..It was soooo damn scary he was so close to kissing the car in front of him

furthermore his car being manual everytime he steps on his clutch his car naturally slides down

a lil... & he was that close a few cm from missing the car in front...HAHHAHA

then he already sweating like shit..probably scared like hell!! hahahhaa poor dear!

But I must compliment your driving skills for a P plate U drive awesome..then again malaysia

roads! cannot compare with singapore U must be damn skillful to drive thr..haha..

Ok la eventually we reached the shoppin centre lucky mom didn't scream at us for being late!

she shldn't also la!

Then she said she wanted to have satay celup! probably wad melaka is famous for!

So Jay's mom told him to take us to his relative hse as they were having their own satay celup

there..it was also there where I met this lil girl who strikingly resembles me when i was young

she had the same eyes! same hair same fringe exactly the same look as me when i was 3!!

she is sooooo adorable I was so shock i cldn't believe my eyes..A carbon copy of me! hahaha..

Freaky!

After satay we went to my Granny's place where the older folks gambled & the younger ones

like us planned wad to do for the night..haha Jay was going to take me clubbin with the cousins

then mom had a quarrel with me abt that was so mad I left the hse & went to take a walk with

my beer..then out of no whr bebe came with his bike to find me!! haha so sweet la he.. he ride

me arnd so i can cool off... while they all tried thinkin of a way for me to go..

In the end when we got back..my mom suddenly ask me "U really wanna go ah?" then i was

like "ah boh den" this was like my last night here..I totally haf to enjoy myself.. So we bebe

drove my mom me n sis back while me n my sis showered & i took her with me for our night

of clubbin which my mom wasn't aware abt.. But my sis turned out to be an utter

disappointment..! she humiliated me & I know I will never ever bring her out like this again..

Everyone of my friends felt if they were me they wld haf slapped their sis...for making such

a scene..Her imbecile & childishness really showed me how she cldn't carry herself at all..

One night of intoxication she destroyed the relationship we shared as sisters...

Til now I've got no words to say to her... All I can say is the world will never stop spinning

even with 1 less of u around.. Stop comparing & be happy with wad U haf.. Never judge others

especially so if you know nuts about their life you don't go acting like U know everything &

throw a scene.. U don't go tell someone how they shld run their life when they've lived it for

20 yrs compared to 15!!

U don't go telling someone how your more capable & sensible than that person where all u do is

cry on your tiny ass bed every god damn night over little boys..

& U certainly don't tell someone who has sheltered U from the deepest darkest cruel secrets

& painful truths all this 15 yrs of your life that she is nothing but a dumb fool!

U knew nothing about my life & what I endured for U but in 1 night of intoxication U judged

me this way!! I've put with u that night because I didn't wanna embarass u tthe way U

did to me! I didn't stoop to ur level but yet after it all U told me 1 thing..

I do not wanna see your face!

Thanks alot... I hope U'll stay far from me from now on...

Pls Do cos in a way I fucking hate u..

U maybe my sister..But u've been a very selfish one...

Grow up Jana! the way you acted that night if I wasn't arnd

I can imagine the worst! Guys find this kind of girls cheap & easy to get...

U've not been in the clubbin world to noe your still a greenhorn...

So ya please don't ever come running to me...I don't know how else to help U...

From now on anything find your brother..likewise I do the same...

Love you bro..

Sorry everyone for the sudden outburst out of no where...haha..

That was about my malacca trip that was how it ended & of cos a sad goodbye to my

dearest baby! I'm missing him so much even as I type..

I just can't wait to see him again..
Muaxx...
Baby I don't know wad the future holds,
But I do believe God is fair,
He knows what best for us,
& we've already been through this much in such a short time,
I know our determination & passion will take us through all this odds,
Have faith like what U told me..
I'm keeping the faith..
♥
The pics will be uploaded soon..
Stay tune...
xoxo-

2008-12-21T14:30:00.002+08:00

I'm suddenly in love with this song! hehe..

Yuan Liang Wo - Xiao Jing Deng

For now I'm too lazy to blog about last night so i'll blog about it later ya..love yall...

This is me right here right now........

2008-12-20T16:53:00.005+08:00

Ok being emo for once but this song really meaningful to me hence it's on my blog now ...

BEYONCE - “IF I WERE A BOY”

If I were a boy
Even just for a day
I’d roll outta bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted then go
Drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wated
And I’d never get confronted for it.
Cause they’d stick up for me.

[Chorus]
If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man.
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
If I were a boy
I could turn off my phone
Tell everyone it’s broken
So they’d think that I was sleepin’ alone
I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’d be faithful
Waitin’ for me to come home (to come home)

(Chorus)
It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say its just a mistake
Think I’d forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong

(Chorus)
But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand
Yeah you don’t understand
How it feels to love a girl someday
You wish you were a better man
You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you’ve taken her for granted
And everything you have got destroyed
But you’re just a boy

This song reminds me of a friend who was just a boy then...haha.

& hopefully a man & be a better man soon..

I hope u guys won't jump conclusions as to who...

I won't give the name too...

But when I hear this song I can't help it but feel all weak inside..

Hahah..

Lols in particular one part that goes if I were a boy I could turn off my phone & tell

everyone is broken so they'd think that I was sleeping alone...

Well why do girls have so much insecurities when they're just with a boy

now i get it...

in the midst of boys growing to be men they make the worst mistakes..

some minor others devastating...

it's sad when we females fall victim to them & their learning curves...

yet almost all of us have...

Ok maybe I haven't cos I've never actually dated guys my age since

the age of 16...I guess i wanted the security

til now im 19...hahaha.. & going on 20...

in a way or another I never had to deal with growing up with that person

now I sort of crave for that I guess...

i've been running away from myself for a long time...

I used to fix such weird expectations for myself on the kind of guy I'm

suppose meet.. eg. U girls know me i've never even gave a second look if

the guy is below 25 that kinda shit... hahaha.. & even as I met my criterias

of the kind of age group I want it was superficial cos we just couldn't click

but I just played a game of pretence... Now I realise that I've wasted all

my time & others as well..

The other part is...

Jus as I thought I'd found someone to grow up with

there comes so many obstacles..

haha so interesting...

life is so interesting...

U know what I just felt like blogging & I don't what the fuck I'm really saying here but forgive

me!! haha.. i'm full of contradictions...

MyHotComments

MyHotComments

What a girl really wants? I'm quite that simple girl i guess...

MyHotComments

Within a every girls heart..

MyHotComments

MyHotComments

Haha & am I the type of girl that...

MyHotComments

I just pray myself to sleep every night that everything is gonna be ok...

2008-12-19T18:18:00.001+08:00

Sat 13th Dec & Sun 14th Dec..

2008-12-19T17:17:00.002+08:00

Ok this 2 days were spend with as you all so call him "Mr Malaysia" haha.. girls his name

is jeremy or Jjay.. hahaha.. feel a lil awkward callin him Mr malaysia la LOL. anyway

i fetched him from the airport & it was really funny cos I cldn't find him when he was

actually just right in front of my face la! hahaha *smacks myself*

I brought him to his godbro's place in toa payoh after that so he could leave his stuff down

& then go out again.. we went to town had a good time we click really well... he has a sense

of humour which is what I tink it's an absolute necessity. Not too quiet til the point of being

mute or non-existant. hahaha so we had dinner at kopitiam opposite cineleisure had like

stingray it was not too bad... I just realised they opened a "botak jones" there too! but

nothing that fantastic la.. after which we took a long walk to clarke quay haha where he

was having stomach pain poor fella so we sat somewhere to rest awhile & cam-whored..

hehe.. after which we headed to brewerkz for drinks & I realise he can't drink beer! ahahha

he's a hard liquor person... he felt high aft just 2 mugs of beer.. Lol he especially hates it

when the beer turns warm so he will hurry hurry drink..hahha funny la he... after that I

can still torture him somemore we decided it was a night of walking so we walked from

clarke quay to selegie!! Leo's workplace for drinks...Hahahah. but when i went there leo

was not there!!! he sabo-ed me he went to watch twilight wanted to strangle him...

that was about my night actually.. Had a great day...Sooooo happy! :)

MyHotComments

On sunday, I met him at his godbrother's played with his godbro's dog for awhile her name is

Duchess and she really one hella an active dog... she's so adorable!! damn cute...she never barks

however, she loves biting on my hand salvating all over my clothes it so annoys me but noe

she doesn't mean it... she's really obedient hehe i ask her to sit & she does tat I ask to go to

her bed & sit there & stay she understands...she's lovely wished I could have taken her home..

Anyway Jjay & I took her downstairs for a walk & to poop...hahaha then we run like idiots

for once we felt like kids and parents at the same time gosh it's a really strange feeling...

haha. We were then suppose to go for mass but situation didn't allow us too God forgive us..

haha but honestly its first time i meet a guy after so long who can step into the church with me

hahaha.know wad i mean? lol.

then we were suppose to meet my mom for dinner at city hall but his godbro already cooked

& hence he feels bad if he didn't eat so we stayed for dinner & after that rushed down to

cityhall for dinner with mom & ate even more hahahhaa. i ate little la but he....hahahha

poor thing... but he's skinny anyway he should EAT!!! jus like me... haha..

dinner was alright... the pizza super spicy i so cldn't eat it...I practically ate nothing & got

scolded for that again.. haha... after dinner we had no idea wad to do we walked all the way

down to bugis but ended up not doing anything there...so we took a bus down to town where

I could have my coffee beans at paragon...it was raining the whole time... we walked in the rain

& the weather was freezing...hmz but it was romantic i guess...isn't it? hahahha..

But falling sick won't be fun la... After coffee we walked to orchard towers to check it out...

my god the bapok's there are so ugly...geez... So we ended our day by taking the last train

back to toa payoh.. where I chill there with him for awhile we were freezing out asses off...

hahaha.. that was abt the day... the next day he flew back to KL... was a sad part... hahahha..

shall not elaborate on that...sorry ppl...

love you all..

MyHotComments

MyHotComments

Overdue post..

2008-12-16T15:41:00.002+08:00

Hey guys damn I've been so lazy to update..

SIGH!

Anyway i think i'm gonna do a really brief summary starting with 5th dec..

Met besties with lil jerome.. then had lunch at lerk thai...thought it was ok only

food wasn't that great.. but darling mer treated us..Thanks alot babe =)!

then we shopped arnd abit while hoping jerome would sleep..

which eventually he did.. went to the puma shop saw a really nice jacket

& tot it wld suit leo perfectly it was so nice.. so comfy! it's dark brown in colour

cost like 109 bucks but mer paid by credit card so thr were further discount to

90 bucks like that so we split it among us 3 way!! leo's bday pressie! Hope he'll

like it! He better like it!! hahaha.

then walked arnd somemore saw a nice bra in clubmarc was having their huge sale...

wanted to buy it then mer & steph said I shld definitely try it first...Me being confident

thought it wld fit perfectly in the end.. it didn't! hahaa so uncomfortable somemore..

sometimes we should just listen to our besties..

LOL.

Jerome finally woke up aft a great nap...& he's been eagerly waiting for his boat ride ever

since we told him that we'll be going for it but not unless he sleeps first..otherwise the

no boat ride...or one more was that the uncle was having his lunch first..!! hahahaha.

the uncle really had a long lunch man...lols...( the uncle referring to the driver of the boat..)

Ok... we headed to suntec took the hippo bus to clarke quay on the bus steph & I purchased

our tickets for the rivercruise.. was raining the whole bloody day...was freezing my ass off

lately been getting caught under the rain no wonder i feel so sick...geez..

Aft the nice scenic boat ride...camwhored a lil in the toilet...mus say jerome is a really

smart kid took some nice photos..hehe..

Then headed for vivo where we got tickets for song the sea...then agn it was raining &

we late for the show... took the monorail to sentosa.. must say the effects were really great

but not worth my 8 bucks cos it was practically too short... & the rain really dampened my

mood my stupid skirt was soaking wet cos it was brushing against the wet floor... it was

a bad rainy day for me!! damn it! but aft all Jerome & besties made the day really fun!

We came back to vivo had fucking horrible starbucks...stupid shit i'll never enter vivo's

starbucks again i swear! they give horrible service! they're more bothered bout laughin

& making everyone wait...the fruit cake taste like their face like dat! poor jerome was

meant to be his bday cake but he spat it out cos he didn't like it! even i myself found

it disgusting...poor mer also had to drink her bitter caramel marchiatto... end of the

night jerome said goodbye to godma steph & we all headed to take the cab while

steph took the bus home.. the queue was really long & some funny stuff happen

in the queue this egytian baby gal standing behind us went up to jerome touched

his face & asked him if he wanted to be friends...haha so cute...but she got pulled

away by the mum...tink they are muslims or smth...the whole family looked stuck up

can't stand them...lil girl was cute...but jerome as usual very shy...haha...he was cutely

clad in mer's big shirt hahah he look like a mini hip hopper...haha somemore with the

thomas & friends cab his godma gave him...love that boy...so cute.. we took the cab

went back jerome kissed me goodbye then mother & son went up! felt bad tho cos

I didn't help mer carry the tons of stuff she had.. sorry babe.. anyway the day ended

with me being incredibly shagged!!

Love you guys & here are some pics...

***Warning too many pictures..***

2008-11-30T11:46:00.003+08:00

Nov 28-29

Friday, went out with the girls...met mer & steph up at bugis..we went to collect

our results from school...then wanted to register for jan's papers but karen said

we had to do it online...haha//

After which we walked arnd for abit we went to M1 cos mer wanted to know more bout

her Xperia fone..haha that girl's obsessed with tat fone la.. then steph took a

number cos she wanted to renew her student subscription thing.. I suddenly like

the Omnia more than the Iphone..lol..cos it seems more worth it..seriously..

according the the guy the Omnia has more advantage as compared to the Iphone

such as the Omnia has 5mp camera i tink iphone is only 2mp.. & don't know wad else

abt the wifi he was explaining... But ting is Iphone beats Omnia in terms of

the colour resolution & its touch screen...

Anyway enough of the Iphone...Im still not ready to get it anyway...

After that we walked down to lil india cos Merissa wanted to thread her brows..

Aft threading Mer & I were getting hungry so I suggested we went for drinks at

a near by backpackers hostel & eat thr as well... I must say the service freaking

sucks la!!! all the service staff thr were ang mohs..& they were not exactly

friendly or anythin! stupid la...But I must say they had this really nice cocktail

call "JAM JAR" there..was only 5 bucks for 1...& the serve it in a real jar!! haha!

tasted like fruit punch real nice...then for dinner I had spag bolo..ok only..

Mer was not allowed to eat the chips or anything so in the end she settled for her

salads! hahaha.. poor babe! but we're just trying to help her la... & she gonna help

me with my upcoming exams..lols...good ey?! ;) lols

Ok then after that, Mer's mom kept calling her cos she was late to go back..& I sort

of feel bad cos I sort of had a part to play in causing her to be late//... sorry

babe... really hope all is well for her now...that was about my day...As usual I

always have a great time out with em...:) loves...

here are the pics of the day..

Ok hope u like the pics babes..mer sorry i didn't crop but I really tink u look good

try not to be too paranoid la..k? haha.. anyway yest.. did nth much except that I

attempted to cook! Never ever been successful even in frying & egg so tats what i

exactly did..fry an egg...lols..I know everytime I try to fry smth or cook smth

it always goes horribly wrong I turn the kitchen into chaos..seriously..I not made

for that..can't cook for nuts...but i don't noe yest i wanted to learn how to fry an

egg & without burning the kitchen down..lols..so i tink it turned out really well

tis time! for once! I made it! So guys I'm not exactly good for nothing! I can learn

to be a housewife too!! hahaha i've got skills! lols

OKOK so here's how the egg with onion turned out..

HAHAHA.look more like roti prata.roti chanai right? LOLs...but such a simple egg

tasted awesome!..;)Ok aft that I brought my darling rabbit to the pet shop for

his grooming & nail cutting! & here are 2 photos of my darling cutie!

I LOVE HIM!

My son! My lover! My everything la!!! wahahhahaa.

Okok..while we left him at the pet shop I actually went grocery shopping with

mumkins..she also bought me an office top and some other necessities as she know

I'm quite broke & rather touched bout that cos she seldoms buys me tings..All along

I've been supporting myself & suddenly I felt like a small girl agn..Lols..sometimes

it's so nice to jus be with mum & never grow up! But it's not happening NEVER

gonna happen..LOLS...

Aft everything...she cooked dinner & considering the fact she seldom cooks cos she's

not good at cooking the ayam masak merah tasted fantastic..*applauds for mom*

I just spent the whole day at home watching money not enough 2 & laughin my ass off

then we went for late night movie at downtown east...I watched madagascar 2 agn cos

mum wanted to watch it...but she dozed off halfway jus like me during the 1st time

I watched it lol.. Ok that was abt my day!!

I LOVE JULIAN the KING! hahhahaha.

I like to move it move it
She likes to move it move it
He likes to move it move it
We like to MOVE IT!

Out of here...

2008-11-25T18:44:00.002+08:00

24 Nov

Ey darlings, back!

Yest I was feeling so sick thats why I didn't update... Was having diarrhea the whole

damn day..I swear I felt so weak...I could barely move...But despite that I still went

to visit my granny at her place...My uncle brought my little cousin to my place first cos

apparently adores me! Hahhahaa she told my uncle said when she grows up she wants

to look like me all...lol...so cute la she....haha...

At my granny's place I just caught up with her a lil bit! been so long since i saw her i missed

her so much...she asked me to go up to malacca with her on th 17th of dec for smth...

I would love to go to the portugese settlement & get to meet my cousins whom I've never

really met... haha good opportunity for me to really understand my heritage...;)

then she asked me to go for evening mass with her & i so cldn't reject her can I?

I mean she's old & all I feel bad to reject her la...Hahaha...she's so nice & all...

so in the end just go la.. gosh I feel so holy! but you can imagine her then she goes for

evening mass everyday & goes for novena every saturday without fail! how's that?!

my family's really holy la! which i guess is a good ting... Jus me! I'm like the lil devil!

Haha.

Aft church my uncle dropped me off at amk...in the car I was already feeling terribly faint &

pale cos of my uneasy stomach..I felt like vomitting for some reason! In the end I took a cab

back from amk...from my house to amk is quite near..& yet it still cost me like 9 bucks! fuck

the stupid peak hour charges man! freaking hate it...

When I reached back i did nothing but lie down.. my mom wanted to take me to the docs

but I told her i'd be fine.. In the end all i cld eat was plain bread & I hated it... was so

hungry & weak I ended up sleeping lols... That was my day...;)

25 Nov

Today I did nothing much but I feel alot better from yesterday was suppose to meet

my love, Sammie last night,she jus came back from melbourne & she was suppose pick me up &

go to mustafa but last min I couldn't cos I felt terrible...so sorry babe but i'll definitely meet u up

soon k? & btw darling welcome to the SINGLES club! haha i know i sound contradicting... But

I tink i am single...am I? haha..

we girls need a break from relationships as you said we've been in too many long perplexing

relationships for so long it's exhausting...as I said lets enjoy life to the fullest, party hard

while we can..we're only young once.. & also concentrate better on carving out that dream

career for ourselves..love can always wait i've learnt that..;) & esp building up friendship

I don't have love but I have wonderful friends & to me thats better than love itself..

Hmm...I spend my whole day today sending out resumes as well immediately I got 2 calls

& 1 interview for tomorrow! yayyy it's at chinatown point this recruitment agency is

looking for people to assist them...manfield agency or smth...name sounds dodgy..

but anyway this time I really hope to get a job! really desperate & need to work

already otherwise I'll be a pathetic broke... ;(

After all that I went to hougang mall for awhile to have gelare's half price

waffles! yum it was fabulicious! haha.. tat was about it!

Oh ya tomorrow Me & dearest Godma will be bringing my grandma to chinatown

haha she so poor ting always cooped up at home & since she's on wheelchair it's

always difficult to bring her around futhermore she's really old & often get tired easily!

but since I've got an interview there anyway it's like killing 2 birds with one stone! ;)

I'm a fantabulous granddaughter..haha..

Bye...

Cute lil cousin jaynee..

Me!

Gelare's waffles...yum..

2008-11-23T20:08:00.012+08:00

Steamboat night!

Met mer & steph darlings yesterday afternoon at bugis with cute lil jerome too!

He was so hyper & all so chirpy...so fun playing with him..haha...love kids...

first we had lunch by hong kong cafe...then walked abt a lil bit...mer loved tis burberry

weekend perfume so much! haha. her fren's gettin it for her tho..lucky babe!

After which we had drinks by tcc with the babes...while jerome slept! haha! after

which we sent jerome off to mer's parents...& we headed to leo's place for steamboat

nights started out fine when we arrived there leo's other frens were already there

they were playin mahjong & stuff... didn't talk much with them i felt rather anti social

but i tink because i was tired..i didn't even drink much...i ate little too though the soup

was really delicious...! i just drank wine...after that was so tired i went to sleep in leo's

room..then there was this ANNOYIN guy who came in to sleep as well i was so tired

I didn't even care that he slept beside me! but he jus kept talking & talking! asking me

stupid qns! I was so close to telling him "STFU" seriously!! if i cld punch him I would!

swear his irritating!

Then after that i ignored him I told him I want to sleep & I just continued my sleep!

Then ppl kept coming in & out talking so loudly esp LEO! lols that drunkard! kept

shouting! then at abt 2am mer woke me up saying she's leaving so we left tgt la!

but before we left a series of events took place...was really dramatic..I don't really wanna

talk about it! but since the person has apologise & all i'll let it past...esp apologise to mer!

Babe no matter what we're friends & we know this kind of things are bound to happen

as friendship has it's ups & downs...we had rode the storm...so whats is this for us right?

let's just let it past k?

MyHotComments

Here are some pics we took! Enjoy!

Love Yall!

2008-11-22T12:52:00.002+08:00

Lovely Saturday!

MyHotComments

2008-11-21T10:50:00.005+08:00

2008-11-21T09:04:00.003+08:00

Updates on sunday, the day after jb & sis conmfirmation day...

Anyway before that I actually forgot to add about the Big Da Pau that Leo ate...It was really huge like as huge as mer's boobs or bigger..lols.. but it tasted horrible...i didn't like it...haha got like one kind of chao seng smell....// Then we also ate the wanton mee..I must say the wanton mee is really nice esp the wanton.. Yumyum.. but the down side is it's freakin EX la! fook man it cost like freakin 29 ringgit! A rip-off! damn it... Ok tats abt JB! ;) Day of confirmation... I had to rush & bathe i didn't even do my make up lol...looked like shit... the church was so packed...my bro was sleeping throughout the whole mass as he didn't slp for a night...& me?! I havent slept in 2 NIGHTS! hahahaha. & yet i still manage to stay awake thoughout! damn it.. After that we headed to cafe cartel to have lunch...agn my bro slept & i was dozing off while waitin for the food was simply too tired to eat.. halfway thru my mom lost her apetite too & da pao everything & went back haha...the moment we got back my bro started snoring away on the sofa like a pig...hahaha...while i washed up & everythin & headed for my beauty slp i can't rmb how long i slept for alrdy.. but very very long... that was about my day.. Monday i did nothing much lazed at home... got my new computer & laptop both hp... i'm loving it i just find it hard to use...windows vista is abit difficult i still hafta learn.. Anyway, then tues, went out with my sis & mom to celebrate her 15 bday...we went shopping after which we headed to chijmes for dinner & drinks..we had drinks by Harry's bar first, as usual i had my fav mango margarita, my sis had mojito( my fav too) hahaha...my mom let her drink...den i drank both including my mom's wine & suddenly i felt high & started laughin & laughin at nothing...lols.. after that we had dinner at hogs breath cafe..food was so so only I don't tink it was nice i't was really quiet there though...guess it cos it was a tuesday thats y... were all too tired & my mom didn't drive so we took a cab home & i slept in the cab...soooo tired....wen i went back i immediately slept.... thats bout my day... also bought a couple of dresses & tank top...the tank top frm cotton on that steph wore... that was so nice i bought one..haha...nice babe!! i love it!! also bought a dress from max & more...;) On weds...i went out in the evening with max we caught madagascar 2....it was so funny I kept laughin...I especially love the character Julian the lemur! his so damn funny i tell u... but half way thru i fell aslp in the cinema & almost snored!! hahahaha lols... max was like wake up ur breathin heavily...lols... i notice i jus love sleepin..im like a pig man... On thursday, I actually went down to caesars for awhile..hoping to see shuping but i guess she came only later i was there at bout 6 plus & she wasn't so sad...I actually promised her i'd come down & see her one of these days...miss her... but i saw bonnie & chatted a lil bit with her.. Also saw becky as usual her voice still as loud..! & bad attitude...wads new...hahaha bonnie damn funny when she saw me she was like "ni hui lai zhuo gong ah?" HAHA... i was like over my dead body man... raymond still owes me money!! i jus don't wanna press for it anymore give up! then after that i went back home lo...jus had a couple of beers...;) Now or rather today I don't know wad to do rdy..so broke & my stupid pay still haven't come i'm so pissed...I wanna kill felix!!! arghh...

I'm outta here...

2008-11-20T13:27:00.001+08:00

Hey darlings...

It's been ages ages i know since I even blog...as i've been a lazy girl...as usual...haha
Anyway if not for the constant persuasion of both of U (steph & mer)
I tink i'll still be too lazy to blog...lols.. but suddenly tis urge to blog cos i've
got simply so much to say bout last sat! I had such a great time! I can't
really remember when i last had tis feeling.. It first started with me not sleepin the night
before & i tot i was gonna be like all tired & restless but in the end i became all hyped up..
I guess it's them steph, mer & leo... Anyway, steph & mer came to novena to
& waited for me to finish novena with my mum then leo came to pick us up
& we left for jb.. the customs were surprisingly warm & hospitable it really felt strange
the whole trip through frm tuas to malaysia's customs to even the toll they all so nice..
At the toll we were like short of 10 cents or smth & the guy jus said nvm it's ok.. we
so grateful haha... then we went circling arnd finding a place to eat leo was like cursing cos
we were lost & he missed his turns! hahahaha. funny la tat guy... then finally we settled on tis
chinese restaurant we park the car at the roadside whr we had to pay tis guy like 10RM jus
to park thr!! god i was cursing! I could haf parked my car for a few hours in a shoppin mall
in town over here! geez..
Then we headed to haf dinner whr the boss or smth was so hospitable kept askin us if we
needed tis & tat...The omelette we ate was nice we had deer meat too! I'll upload the pics later!
then wad spoilt my apetite & made me embarass myself! A cat! yes! tis cat out no whr brush
across my leg under the chair unaware & in shock i grabbed merissa & she scream then i screamed even louder!! hahahaha. so funny.. aft tat were the frightenin cockroaches...freaked
me out! I'm so terrified of insects esp cockroaches...makes my hair stand! ok finally we out
of thr...we went rounding agn & we settled for the karaoke lounge at taman sentosa we
opened a bottle of chivas for bout 412rm with 2 mixers, at first i tot we weren't able to finish
but we actually did! 5 hrs to finish 1 btl & surviving on 2 mixers but poor leo drank most of it
mixed with water cos he wanted to save the mixers for us....so sweet...haha.. halfway through
steph & mer wanted to go to the toilet & the actually took their bags walked out of the room only to come back in within secs with the server..he then opened tis small door beside the
screen & guess wad?! it was the toilet!!! Hahahaha. i guess we're so used to the toilet being
centralised we totally didn't realise it...lol.. then merissa went to the toilet ...next i went...
when i did smth really gross happened i shall not mention it here....haha..
other than tat we cam whored the whole night...played games...chit chat & really
enjoyed each others company.. really love them...
when i tink of all tat we went through within
tis time span of bout 1 & a half yrs or more,
it brings smiles & tears to my eyes....
we actually did so much tgt...
went through the good times & the bad...
overcomed the odds & still remain frens...
I appreciate them for accepting me tis way... For my worst & best as mer has said..
To the many more happy times to come just with you all!
I LOVE YALL!

Ok tats about all im going to update the rest of the pics u can view in my facebook or friendster! cheers=)